So I’m currently dealing with the chaos and uncertainty of a crowdfunding campaign.
And hands down, this is one of the most intense and scary things I’ve ever faced (and I’ve been to Great American’s Halloween Haunt Night). The past couple weeks I often find myself asking questions like “Is this really happening?” “What am I doing?” “When is a generous millionaire going to swoop in and make everything better?”
Two weeks in and 13% towards our goal, in some ways it would be easy to walk away from this. To pretend this whole thing never happened and let this lifelong dream stay a dream instead of something I’m full-force trying to make happen.
But at these lowest moments, I often reflect upon why I started the whole thing. Why I originally decided that Candivan needs to exist.
It goes back to fifteen years ago when I first toyed with the idea of a TV station like this one existing. The idea was simple: a channel where shows exist that you’d NEVER see on any other station and that purposefully took chances on shows and creators that no mainstream station would.
The next few days after dreaming this idea, I told everyone I spoke with about it, complete with some show ideas. Most people liked the concept, which felt good, but something even more amazing happened in this process:
NEARLY EVERYONE HAD A SHOW IDEA.
This proved to me that there are so many creative people in this world who would LOVE LOVE LOVE to create TV, but it’s such a long-shot pipe dream, that most never really consider doing it. Either it’s too hard to break in, or it costs too much money to try, or they don’t have the right connections, or they’re not the type of person who would ever get a shot in the industry. Etc etc etc.
To be honest, the idea of Candivan itself didn’t sound realistic either. It seemed like a pipe dream itself. And so I filed it under the same “wouldn’t that be nice” category most of us file “I want to meet a dinosaur one day” under, and I forgot about it.
But then a few years ago I rewatched a movie I adored as a kid and that likely originally placed the seed of Candivan in my head: UHF.
For those who haven’t seen it, Weird Al Yankovic inherits a TV channel, and uses it to put up the most creative and unique content anyone has ever seen. I mean there’s a show called Wheel of Fish. And Kramer hosts a kids show. Ok, there was some really bizarre stuff, but the idea of a network like this is filled with so potential and imagination.
Now, deep in the Golden age of television, and with so much progress, like streaming video, I realized the idea of Candivan was a possibility. For the next few years I’ve been working on taking it towards that reality.
And here we are, in the midst of the campaign. And it’s difficult and scary and one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done.
But every time I get tempted to walk away from it--because, in reality, our own dreams and fantasies are so easy to dismiss--I remember all the people who have ideas for shows and who would love to create, but dismiss those fantasies because “it’s just not possible.” And I push forward because I know Candivan can be a place that does make it possible.
This can be the UHF where there’s an open door for all creative people who want to live out their dreams.
With all kinds of opportunities for making low-budget shows, audience members acting as producers instead of network executives, and fun, interactive elements that will engage people, Candivan can be that television utopia. It can be that creative playground for that part of all of us that asks “what if…?”
And this is why I will fight till the bitter end to make this happen. 13% now, but I’ll bite and claw for every additional percent.
If you also have ever asked “what if…” or if you just like this idea, you can help. By donating, spreading the word, or just helping with Candivan in any way that you’d like to help...you’d be making a huge difference.
We can all turn that dial together (well, I guess that figurative internet dial) and get to something truly new and different.
Peace, love, and Kit Kat Bars,